If you are seriously picking sides without hearing BOTH sides, then you and her can fuck off. I don’t even understand why you would pick her side though. I. Didn’t. Do. ANYTHING. My best friend of three years dumped me with no explanation. Honestly though, someone PLEASE tell me what I did to deserve getting shit on and fucked over. Please. Because I have no idea what happened. At all.
it’s really fucking sad that we can’t be friends..
low key eating me up inside. i miss my best friend.
life isn’t fair.
I have to physically restrain myself from saying something whenever she’s around. I have to put my hand over my mouth to keep from blurting something out. If I talk to her, at all, I’m a bully. Which is the shittiest thing ever. I’m the bully even though I’m the one who’s been crying everyday. I’m the bully even though I’m the one who got fucked over. I’m the one who got dumped out of nowhere from her best friend since freshmen year. I’m the one who got stabbed in the back. I’m the victim here, yet she turned it around so that I get all the shit. And why? Because she’s a total bitch. I still have no idea why she suddenly hates me or what happened or how long ago. If it’s what I’ve heard, she’s telling people slightly different stories that never happened. I didn’t go out of my way to bump into her. It was passing period; I was pushed into her. I did not bitch out her and her friends at ThesCon. I wasn’t even talking to her because she told me to find someone else when I was having a panic attack and needed her. I was with my sister the entire time at ThesCon, so if you don’t believe me, ask Alie. She needs to stop making shit up and accept that she’s in the wrong, but she never can. She’s a selfish bitch who wasn’t there for me last semester when I needed her. If I didn’t have Alastair, I honestly would not be here today. He was the only person there for me. This is not me being dramatic; this is me being honest.
You are such a fucking princess and I’m so done with your shit.
You think you can do whatever the fuck you want and don’t think of the consequences because you don’t think there will be any. You only think of yourself. You don’t care what you do or who you hurt.
What hurts the most is that you won’t even try to fix it. You’re not going to try to talk to me. You won’t even give me a lame-ass excuse as to why you did that. You do whatever the fuck you want because you don’t care about anyone but yourself.
It’s been almost a week and I don’t even get an explanation. This just tells me how little you actually cared about our friendship and it breaks my heart. We used to be so close freshmen and sophomore year, and now we barely talk. You used to be there for me. You used to care about me. When my appendix ruptured, you read me stories in the hospital and got me to get up and walk down the hall. A few months ago, I needed you and you told me to find someone else. What changed?
I’ll be frank: you turned into an asshole when smoking became your life. You started distancing yourself from everyone and wouldn’t talk to me. I never see you and you never talk to me unless I talk to you first. I hate being the only one who cares about our friendship. If you don’t care, why should I?
The fact that you can go through your days without thinking about me or our now-ruined friendship sickens me because while you’re not giving a fuck what you do or who you hurt, I’m in my room crying. Can you honestly tell me you don’t miss me? Do you miss how things used to be? Do you care at all?
Remember that time I really needed you and called you crying to see if you could be with me? Remember how you told me you had friends coming over soon so you couldn’t? I remember it. And I remember swallowing too many pills. I knew it wasn’t enough to kill me, but I hoped it would. Would you regret not being there for me if I died? Would you even miss me?
Last summer, on your birthday, we were talking on your guest bed very late at night. I was crying and said I wished people didn’t care about me because that would make it easier for me to kill myself. You grabbed my hand tightly and sobbed, “Please don’t.” Where’s that now? Where was that last semester especially?
Maybe I’m being dramatic, but I can’t believe I’m the only one who gives a fuck about that friendship. We’ve been through everything. We’ve seen each other cry, I stayed at your house a few days when my parents were gone, you helped me when I had appendicitis, we’ve shared secrets, we had a Disney movie all-nighter, I’ve been to your family birthday dinners, we smoked together for the first time, we were centaurs, we made fishing cupcakes, we talked about boys and crushes and relationships and love and sex, we used to be so close. How can you throw all that away so easily? You could fix it all if you would talk to me.
If you can really forget about that all and stop caring, then I guess that’s it. If our friendship meant nothing to you, then you can just fuck off. I don’t need people like you in my life when I have other people who actually give a fuck about me. Good luck pushing people away and keeping to yourself and doing whatever the fuck you want. It won’t get you far in life, but then again, you don’t care.
What if I’m not better? What if I’ve been tricking myself into believing I’m better so I don’t have to go back?
Waking up in the middle of the night sucks. What sucks even more is when you can’t sleep because there’s so much on your mind and you cry in the middle of the night because there’s no one to talk to.